A few months into Lindsay Jill Roth’s whirlwind transatlantic courtship with a handsome Englishman, he made a comment that hit her like a gut-punch: “I don’t know you well enough yet.” Despite hours on FaceTime and swoon-worthy dates in London and NYC, Roth realized he was right: they didn’t know each other very well. And their relationship, while certainly romantic, was hardly practical. Did they even have a shared vision for the future?

In the age of increasingly impersonal dating, how do you get off the dating hamster wheel and advance a relationship along the path to commitment? How do you know if you’re with “the one"?